Monday, January 21, 2013

Background and New Truths.

Random spark of inspiration strikes at the strangest times. Not one bit do I dislike the fact that it's hit me now, though. I mean...a lot has happened in the past year. I'm not going to go that far into depth but just enough to get the basics.

I fell in love and moved out to Dallas. Then I left my job at Walmart to try and transfer and get a better position at the store closer to my new apartment with Julia. They basically gave me the run-around. They terminated me from my Walmart and I was no longer able to work for them. At the beginning of May, I got arrested because Julia and I got into a fight. I know what happened was wrong, and I really have learned my lesson. I started working at Sears and they stopped scheduling me. In order to save the apartment, I sold everything I had pretty much. Guitars, game systems, games, books, CDs. You get it... Literally everything. We ended up losing the apartment just in time for me to start working at Gamestop. We then got a storage unit and moved everything into it in a day or so. Julia and I packed up the cats and moved into the Suites of America. She was supporting that financially with her job at QT Kitchens which she lost around Halloween. From there we began a motel tango. Got kicked out of the first one for having cats. The second hotel didn't like that we had two people in one room without them knowing. From there we bounced from the streets to the Econolodge when we could come up with the money for it. Julia got arrested and from there I went and stayed with my best friend's parents. I picked up a seasonal job with UPS helping deliver packages. Unfortunately that ended on Christmas Eve. We're close to losing storage due to late payments. I've recently gone out to Mineral Wells. I'm currently living with my Mom. We're staying at one of her close friend's house. I've become what I'd like to consider friends with her son and we've been jamming together with a couple guitars. I'm fifty two days sober after a minor binge. I'm gonna lay it all out there, I got mixed up with heroin. You can judge me all you'd like, but it was my mistake to make. What's done is done and I've learned my lesson. I'm done with that shit and it's not worth it. I've seen the destruction around me and in the people I met along the way. It's not a place I'd like to be back in ever again. I'm moving on and dealing with it on my own. I have no fear of relapse if anyone is worried about it. This past year in a nutshell doesn't seem so bad, but to be completely honest, I feel like I've aged a good four or five years because of all the stress. I've grown my hair back out and I miss my beard tremendously. I blame UPS for making me ditch it, but the paychecks were worth it, even if it was just for a week in a hotel each time.

I apologize for making that sound like a very long caption you read at the end of documentary that explains what's happened since the filming. Afterword. That's what I was looking for. I know I've said that I'm gonna write again, but I think it's a good time in my life to pick it back up again. I've felt a little inspired; and hey, maybe I can actually finish something this time. I'd like to thank every one that's been there for me when I truly needed them most. I don't have to name any names because I KNOW they know they are and what they mean to me. I love you guys.

Andrew and me messing around on a song called "So Long."




I used to love ending with quotes because everyone knows I can't say it as well as someone said it once before. I read about a view on religion and faith that I never realized was exactly how I felt. It's "a philosophy of the term "God" defining not a being, but in what and how an individual is able to realize a faith and happiness."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey! It's Ashley. I really like this one! We should talk again soon!